I have always liked to write. As a kid I bounced back and forth between wanting to be a teacher and a writer. I had the cute little diaries with the key, and later loose leaf paper and binders. I wrote short stories a little bit as a kid. As a teenager I wrote short stories in the infamous “purple notebook” that my friends and I passed around. I wrote a blog during college that tended more towards grumping and detailing personal challenges.
As the internet became more of a thing, I tried to delete many of my negative comments from the net. I didn’t want to be defined by a harsh opinion I held as a teenager. But I didn’t delete them 😉 And so I periodically read the old journal entries and relive the moments. Some moments I’m proud of, lots of relationships I wish were still alive, and some truly mortifying commentary.
I miss the people of my past. I wish I behaved better in some things. I wish I had lived more in the moment then in the future. And so it goes onward. I’ll make more memories and be ashamed of more events. But I can only hope that I maintain a written record, so I can go back and relive the moments through my words.